Who da’ heck is Caroline Mays?
Branding Lady for 10 Years; Emphasis on Founder Story
Writer, Teacher, Co-Creator of Your Brilliant Dreams, and Author of Bio Like Beyoncé
Maniac on the dance floor
(Also, I run this popsicle stand)
A fulfilling CAREER is something most of us want but, turns out, is a real bugaboo to actually get.
Sweet Jesus, can I get an amen?
Before starting my company a decade ago, I had no real “work history” to speak of, more of a slutty black book of job flings.
I’d get hired at some respectable company, be panic-attack bored within 6 months, and quit by year’s end, retreating back to the restaurant scene where a shitty waitress can always find a gig.
In my defense, I could’ve sprinkled a wad of crackers on my keyboard, released the pigeons, and they’d have done just as fine a job meeting office demands.
Back then I thought tall buildings in big cities were full of smart people yelling time-sensitive details at each other, rudely gesturing towards the clock. ONE WOULD ASSUME they convened at the end of the day with fat cigars and whiskey to celebrate their meaningful accomplishments, and that despite all the office-hour drama, they ultimately loved each other in some toxic, possibly scandalous, way.
Begging the question - Where do I sign?
Here’s My Story
Bummer to discover work was just a bunch of quota-meeting, clickity clack button-pushing, rote instruction-following eked out within the solitary doldrums of one’s poo-poo colored cubicle. How was I supposed to know that adulting entailed an unbearable amount of brain rot and ass melt over the voluminous expanse of ergonomic chairs?
I was a small-town ignoramus who’d moved to a big West coast city from the American South, so it’s easy to invent doe-eyed fantasies about life in the metropolis behind those serious glass doors. “Happy Friday, y’all!!! Quick question, where’s the best hot spot in town to go hang yourself?!”
It’s a miracle anyone discovers their strengths at all. And you might accrue a lot of spiritual damage until you do. To deal, I ran a lot (and rode my bike). My intellectual needs, however, weren’t met UNTIL…I engaged in some nighttime literary activity.
I took a fantastic two-year writing program at UW, and when that ended, I enrolled in all the classes I could afford. I’ve stalked teachers, been taught by a few famous ones, read on stage and in the back of bookstores, published, won scholarships, and wrote at residencies faraway.
My training was less about “content” and more about sensory prose and beautiful character development.
Years later, when I started my company, I got some invaluable kudos for my story work, and was advised to niche there. By some accidental PR from my biopic video (featured on Home Page), and an introduction to the speaker industry, my company went “viral,” and I was booked solid for a year and a half.
Seth Godin even sent me an email.
I’d LOVE to tell you it was smooth sailing from there (hilarious), but fantasies and wishful expectations of what things are gonna be like never last long, and ultimately, they’re not really that interesting.
Knowledge is gathered from our head-splitting labors and wisdom from our jarring disappointments. Useful experience flows at us from every corner, “unprofessional” ones very much included.
So how did you get all your experience and what did it teach you and now, as a result, what wonderfully useful things do you know?
It’s a chin up, tits-out career move to exude the answer to that question. Our objective is to find it, brand it, and use it to your great advantage.
A Few More Random Tidbits if You’re Interested…Might as Well - it IS an About page.
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I live in Portland Oregon with my dog Murray who's eaten exactly 3 human turds, one of which I could've sworn was a pinecone. I still allow this cretin to sleep in my bed, and somewhere in this anecdote lies the definition of Love.
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I’ve always been an athlete - a runner, cyclist, dancer, weight-lifting meat head and I believe this makes me a better writer. You don’t just write with your brain, you write with your entire body.
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I don't have children, somebody has to be the power aunt.
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I invite anyone who thinks they have “imposter syndrome” to question whether or not it’s real…or are you just worried about the opinions of your shittiest, most cynical friends? If it's not them, then WHO is in your head?
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It’s 100% possible to “stand out” as a private person.
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It’s hard to tell now, but besides loving the results of our time together...you’ll probably also enjoy my company.
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I’ve studied Transactional Philosophy, earning 2 biz certificates from Influential U.
You cannot afford to remain ambivalent toward the qualities that make you shine.
And I’m not talking about what’s on your resume.
Know what I love? Helping cool people make cool shit.
Talent, Personality, Experience, Usefulness, Professionalism - you want those qualities to be OBVIOUS. But you can’t just say, “Hey, I have a great personality,” and then provide no proof of concept. That part takes linguistic finesse.
Also, Customer Intimate businesses like yours (and mine) are funky. They are not “personal brands,” they’re business brands where the personhood of the founder is a major distinguishing factor. Like any company, you must sell an offer(s), but unlike every company, you must also sell yourself.
In short, you have to relate to people in a way that the founders of Chipotle don’t have to.
So if a brand is required to have the business, and ultimately the life, you want - WHY WOULDN’T YOU, capitalize on everything you’ve got in order to build it?
At Switchblade Lemonade, we take the ART part of communication quite seriously. We don’t want remarkable people who do remarkable work dismissed as yet another coach/consultant/advisor/jackass in a market of plenty.
In fact, we want the right people scooting forward in their chairs, excitedly thinking - Hold on a second…who the hell is this?
I’m mega sweet